Trip Epilogue

As I head out into the Florida rising sun to head back north, I find myself pensive and thoughtful. Being here in Florida among friends was exactly what I needed this week. In some ways, it became also what I was trying to avoid - even amongst the old friendships and good times were peppered stark and ever so harsh reminders of what I no longer have but still treasure so dearly.

I am at a crossroads - having been yanked unceremoniously from a happy dream and placed roughly at an intersection by unseen hands. Instead of choosing a path, I have been trying to climb back into a womb that I never knew, knowing what I need and want but dependent on others unable or unwilling to be a part of it. Story of my life.

The time will come when more unseen hands will let me know in no uncertain terms that I must choose a direction and get moving, but for now I sit at the branch in the road, looking forlornly back the way I came, knowing that path is the only one I cannot travel.

Today my choice is predetermined. My path takes me true north. Not to home, but towards home, and into the future.

In dreams you have no choices: either there are no decisions to be made, or they were made for you long before the dream ever began.

- Neil Gaiman